I posted the other night about gritting my teeth and getting
on with my creative writing. Well I haven’t. For two reasons mainly, the first
being that I simply haven’t had time, and the other because every time I try, I
have my old tutor’s voice saying ‘naff’ in my head. ‘Naff’ isn’t a very
technical term, but who am I to ignore someone who has ‘Dr’ in front of their
name?
I do need to get on with it, but I have been busy with
placement and such.
Normally I’d be terrified before starting a new placement,
but the 5.30 start and being in Middlesbrough for 7.30 meant it was too early
for fear. I dragged myself to Starbucks as it opened and waited for the girl I’m
working with, looked over our plan and went to the school.
After a confusing moment where we were asked if we were from
the Red Cross, to which we looked blankly and mumbled ‘no… the university… the
workshop,’ we were given our photo ID’s, introduced to the teacher, taken to
the classroom and then left with four rather intimidated, awkward looking 13
year olds. There was absolutely no time to panic.
It’s meant to be a group of eight, but most were on a school
trip. They’re such intelligent kids and we persevered, mainly talking about
ourselves and what we want to do and jumping from activity to activity, hoping
to promote group discussion. This only worked when we left them alone. Or sat
at the desk and pretended to leave them alone. Things soon picked up when we
started playing ‘career charades’ and that game where you have a famous person
on a sticky label on your head and have to ask the other’s questions about who
it is. Only they did it with jobs and careers.
At this point they actually started laughing and talking to
us and I’m really pleased that we couldn’t have had a better behaved group of
kids. Things might liven up next week when we have eight, but the 90 minutes
were fun. Me and Helen paired up for an example for a ‘getting to know you’
activity, and hearing her say it, it sounded like it was coming from someone
else.
‘This is Rachel, she’s got a BA
in English and Creative Writing. She hopes to either be a teacher or a writer
of some sort and is taking a year out to gain as much experience as possible.
She has a fat horse and has been riding for 14 years, obviously likes to read
and write and goes running and to the gym and also likes clothes. She has a
blog, is working on a creative writing project and has previously worked in
retail.’
She made me sound so much more experienced than I often
feel! She stated the facts, nothing about my uncertainty and panic, and I
realised that no amount of uncertainty or panic can take away what I’ve done,
do and am yet to do. This sudden confidence came in useful when I went to the
job centre.
You’d think I’d have more to say about the job centre but I
don’t. It was dull if nothing else. I don’t get why people hang about there all
day. The woman I saw was lovely, but she knows my mam’s friend so I quickly got
the impression that the entire job centre staff body will soon know who I am! I
have to go back to an advisor tomorrow and talk to her about my career
aspirations and things. Who knows, I may come back enlightened. I’m actually
grateful for the opportunity to talk to someone who knows what they’re talking
about.
Also, I have a job interview for a retail position on
Saturday morning. I rang up about it last week and totally forgot about it, and
while it’s probably not going to figure in my long term goals and aspirations,
it certainly fulfils the short term one of making money and getting used to the
work environment and new situations again, and will still let me have that year
out of sorting my head out, gaining other experience and working on my writing.
I’ve found myself thinking about other projects that interest me and feel more
enthusiastic about everything in general.
What with passing my driving test, it seems like things are
on the up. Fingers crossed for the interview!
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